Managed to release some of my tension after crying my heart out and at the same time, thanks to my darling who was so willing to sat down and counsel me. i love you dear :)
Convo is this tuesday.
I am having butterflies in my stomach now.
No rehearsal... nothing.
Just go up and take the certificate and go down.
I wonder how it would feel when you have so many people watching you being called up and take your certificate.
How elegant you must walk....How sophiscated you must look...How you should carry and present yourself to the crowd.
Sometimes i do ponder why i sit and think of my past.
I have already send in an application to university of south australia...
changing my route to health sciences because i find that pharmacy is very competitive...
anyway higher chances of going in to health sciences as compared to pharmacy.
at least with a health science background, i can still take my masters in pharmacy :D
but whatever it is is,
like what my aunt said,
Having a degree is all that matters and doing it on campus at australia itself.
being independent, all alone over there, not even without my dear with me.
How am i going to survive?
Dear told me:
Once you leave do not give up half way.
Go on and and do not turn back.
Pursue your dreams and once your done,
You will be spending the rest of your life with me.
How sweet, but yet pressurizing.
Now i am already so far away from you and going to Australia is worsening.
Who am i to run to when i need someone to hold me, to console me and be there for me when i am down?
Being so far away from everyone that i love,
Not being able to be back for Hari Raya with everyone.
Torture and horrendous.
Miserable and speechless.
Stay by my side please and do not ever let go of your hand from mine.
Your the one person that i can lean on for support and encouragement to get on with life now.
I already carved your name on my heart and only death will part us.
I love you dear... always.. :D
-lost a part of me
4/03/2009 01:58:00 am
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